NOTES FOR YOU: a video in the first person about the book

A quick introduction in first person to the main ideas and the features of my 1st book translated in English, accompanied by images of the book and excerpts from my past compositions of mine.
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4. The addict’s monologue, or, on desire and shadow (a)

I want to beat her, while at the same time I need to hug her warmly, protect her, give her everything. Ah! And I want to have her in bed from morning to night. Fuck her from everywhere, tear her apart without any mercy. [Excerpt from NOTES FOR YOU]
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“NOTES FOR YOU” – without words

A video consisting of selected images from my 1st book translated in English, and music with parts of my past compositions.
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The silent scream

When I think I can never live without you because I sense myself as half a person, I continue to be something whole that simply feels like half... [Video - NOTES FOR YOU]
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Limbo -the endless isolation of our inner child in the basements of our childhood

While talking about our Shadow and the inner child I would say that those children are themselves terrorised. They cannot understand why they are locked up in there. They feel shame and fear
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The cheat’s monologue

“What did you two do exactly, what kind of sex did you have, what position, how many times did you do it, from where, how much, when, what did she have that I lack” [Video - NOTES FOR YOU]
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The intellectualisation of experience​

Our needs are first not experienced mentally but non-consciously and somatically, thus producing an elementary emotional charge (which provides them with their energy); then it is later that our needs take shape in the conscious mind
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Yet, through our yearning and deep thirst for the Other, we think we have done something “wrong”. We shrink, we become much smaller. We take on our own backs the total and unbearable responsibility for events that are not produced by ourselves alone. [Video - NOTES FOR YOU]
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The addict’s monologue

She comes round now and then but only “as friends” she emphasizes. Let her say whatever she wants, I am sure she doesn’t know what she wants either. We’ve even had sex sometimes and it’s like taking my dose. [Video - NOTES FOR YOU]
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The happy ending in fairy ​tales and the unhappy ending in life​

Perhaps, beyond delusions of transcendental justice, our only way to actually move through this life is to accept that we are beautiful even when we feel like frogs
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9. A piano, sex and love

Just as happens with a single piano key, so desire for the Other’s body does not necessarily have to serve some goal on any higher level, in order to give birth to rounded and beautiful moments. That is to say, sexual desire does not necessarily have to serve love. [Excerpt from NOTES FOR YOU]
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Our “Shadow” and an ancient mutual betrayal

...the future mother, will have already built a whole cradle of dreams, wishes, meanings and feelings for her future child - and it is natural that she should imagine the child in accordance with images that are familiar to her and confirm her identity.
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1. On eros and mirrors

Not one of these side-effects of Eros matters at all. Because the Others available to us as our mirrors are countless, so countless will be our chances to experience breaking into fragmented reflections again and again. [Excerpt from NOTES FOR YOU]
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2. The passage

And in this pause in time, full of silence, your hand becomes another hand. A new hand with another meaning, a totally new meaning that starts embracing what I call “your hand”, pushing it elsewhere, somewhere beyond beauty, charm, attraction or aesthetics. [Excerpt from NOTES FOR YOU]
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What we cannot do for our inner child in the Shadow of our childhood

In the past, experience was recorded onto past background A, while current experience is being recorded onto another, present background B, which can neither replace nor erase A
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